I'm not sure if this is original with me or not, but I just thought of it before signing on here.
Patience is not a virtue, it's a miracle.
I came home early today after a scary day for me, though I know Grace is in good hands. We (Grace's mom and I) went in at 12:30 to see her and right off the bat she was crying and all upset. She was mouthing over the things in her mouth with tears in her eyes and making the motion of scissors with her right hand. She was mouthing "CUT THIS OUT" meaning the tube and she also wanted us to free her hands so mom held her right hand and I held her left and kept her from going up to her tube. I explained where she was, and why her feet were wrapped, she wanted to see her thighs where the donor sites were, and why the tube was in. But she was moving hard and with strength, they gave her some more of her meds and that calmed her just a little. She was pretty upset for the full hour we were in with her. Sweating and heartbroken that we couldn't have a calm start to the day I just had to get out and let them give her more to get her sleeping and calm.
I waited until 4:15 and as I walked through the main doors her nurse came to me and told the story that they just gave her 2 new meds, ones they give to psychotic patients after an episode. They found her on the edge of her bed about to get out while her hand was tightly grasping the tube in her mouth. It took 4 adults to contain her and keep her still so they could get these meds in her. She was kicking and very angry he described. He said you can go see her, but don't touch her or talk to her...it's already my greatest fear that she will do something to the tube so I just took the ipod in put some music back on and left. She will remain on one of these meds now to keep her sain and the other med will be there in case they need a quick calmer for her.
The good news is that this happens all the time to burn patients and that they have it all under control. They are watching her very closely there.
So as I'm sure you all knew already by now this tube is driving my lady bonkers, literally. They took an x-ray afterward to make sure there was no damage done with the tube. We somehow need to get to Monday safely and calmly so that throat can heal. But all these movements are not helping either. She needs a miracle and we need that throat to heal so they can extubate her.
I know and have heard already of all your support and prayers, THANK YOU. Please don't tire of going before the throne for Gracie. He already knows completely before the word is on our tongue and God had this ready for us even before she was born. All true, yet it's still hard to see her this way. All vitals and everything else is healing great and I think that is part of her having more strength now too, she is a fighter and we will all look forward to when this blog has some really good news!!!
Thanks again for your love. Grace's dad made it in to the US safely and should be in the area soon. Thanks for praying.
Lamar/Parkay/Slim
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
We are praying for rest and peace and healing. Hang on - God is still in control. He loves you both so very much and will somehow work through even this for His good. Keep loving and trusting!
ReplyDeleteArndts
Lamar and Grace, My heart continues to go out to all of you. We will continue to pray. As you said she is a fighter and that is what is going to get her through this.
ReplyDeleteSuffering's Reward
Our Daily Bread
READ: Romans 5:1-5
We also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance. —Romans 5:3A young Christian went to an older believer and asked, "Will you pray that I may be more patient?" So they knelt together and the man began to pray, "Lord, send this young man tribulation in the morning; send him tribulation in the afternoon; send him—" Just then the young believer blurted out, "No, not tribulation! I asked for patience." "I know," said the wise Christian, "but it's through tribulation that we learn patience."
The word perseverance in today's Scripture can mean the ability to remain steadfast under difficulties without giving in. John A. Witmer wrote, "Only a believer who has faced distress can develop steadfastness. That in turn develops character."
When the apostle Paul told the Christians in Rome that "tribulation produces perseverance" (Romans 5:3), he was speaking from personal experience. He had suffered beatings, whippings, stoning, shipwreck, and persecution. Yet he remained steadfast in his faith and did not shrink from his responsibility to preach the gospel.
If you are facing a difficult test, praise God! Under His wise control, everything that happens to us—whether pleasurable or painful—is designed to develop Christlike character. That's why we can glory in tribulation. — Richard De Haan
Looking back, I clearly see
All the grief that had to be
Left me when the pain was o'er
Richer than I'd been before. —Anon.
He who waits on the Lord will not be crushed by the weights of adversity.
Lamar, I just read your Thursday blog and felt like crying. Ron and I talked about when he was on a breathing tube (only a day) and how scared and frustrated he was that he couldn't talk or swallow. He felt that no one cared how uncomfortable he was. He just feels Grace's pain. Even though this is scary for you too, God cares about what is going on in your life right now. He will never leave you or forsake you. We're praying that the weekend will fly by and Monday will be a great day for Grace.
ReplyDeleteThe Baumans
Lamar,
ReplyDeleteI am praying for healing for Grace. Strength for you.
Matt Beres
Lamar, I didn't realize what had happened, but we are praying for Grace... and I will be asking our youth group to lift her up as well. God is good!
ReplyDeleteParkay,
ReplyDeleteThanks for the blog, man! We just had our biweekly OPE meeting tonight and there were definitely some prayers going up for you guys.
I was reading in Psalm 9 the other day -- if you have a chance, take a minute and read it. I hope you find it encouraging!
Love you and praying for you, brother.
-Flick
Dearest Jehovah Rapha, O Lord our Healer, I come before you in Jesus name, God please, I am not a doctor nor am I a nurse, nor do I have any knowledge that would give credence to what I am feeling in my heart in prayer. Father Gracie is your child, she is your child, please Lord, how do I say I am concerned over the Gracie's strong desire to yank out the tube the doctors feel is doing good for her in the time being while things heal. Lord, please who am I but one who loves you and loves those who love you...God please if somehow Gracie senses something and therefore is reacting to the tube in her throat let her be heard and heeded, I am not sure what I am saying, except I know your Spirit being in her and our prayers on her behalf is not allowing her to calmly wait for the tube to come out in man's wisdom pertaining to timing. Father, please who am I, yet I pray you give Lamar and others your wisdom...your wisdom Lord even if it seem contrary to the wisdom of degreed doctors and nurses...Give Gracie O, Jehovah Shalom your peace and allow her to rest deeply in you as she has others meeting her medical needs...God please be God and do your God thing with Gracie and her family...In Jesus name...in Jesus name Father, I bring these heart felt prayers before you.
ReplyDeleteLamar and Gracie
ReplyDeleteOne of my devotional readings this morning was called difficult days...
Although we must struggle to rise above the distractions and disappointments of everyday living, we never need to struggle alone. God is here....eternally and faithfully, with infinite patience and love. Our friends and family members can help restore perspective and peace to our souls. With God's help, and with the help of family members and friends, you can meet your challenges------and you will!!
The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer; the God of my strength, in whom I will trust. 2 Samuel 22:2-3
So thankful for all your friends that are lifting you and Gracie up to our Father during this difficult time.... Love and prayers, dad and mom king
Lamar,
ReplyDeleteMy heart aches as I read this story, both from picturing Gracie in that state and for you, having to see it and be helpless. You are both in my continued prayers. This verse has meant a lot to me in my life and I hope you may gain some encouragement from it. “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
Love to you both,
Alesha
Lamar,
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to read about another very difficult day - my heart just breaks for both of you. It just doesn't seem like God to let His children suffer, but I know His thoughts are bigger than mine, and when you guys get through this, you'll be refined in a way that only these circumstances could allow. I am praying,
Cheryl W.
Lamar,
ReplyDeleteI am at loss for words! Prayin that God will give you strength to be Gracie's encouragement today. Prayin that God's peace would freely flow into Gracie's life today. I have never been in your shoes....so I go to the ONE who has the perfect plan (even though it makes NO sense right now)
Merlin Stoltzfus
I am so sorry to read your latest post. Remember, Grace thinks it is the tube that is the problem but she is undoubtedly in pain because of the burns and that is more likely the problem. I can only imagine the pain of internal burns! God understands and He has more than enough strength to cover for you when you cannot stand to watch. My son went through severe pain twice in his short life and I, too, had to leave the room when my presence couldn't help. It is not a weakness on your part at all. Only God can meet her needs at a time like this. Hang in there!! Daylight is coming!! Listen to the song "Daylight" by some Christian rock group. I love it!! although it isn't really my style of music.
ReplyDeleteSarah Smith (from Cedarville University)
Just wanted to let you know our thoughts and prayers are with you all.
ReplyDelete"The Lord is near to the brokenhearted And saves those who are crushed in spirit"
Ps. 34:18
Andrea & Sergio Belloso
Grace,
ReplyDeleteWe continue to pray and hold you in our thoughts. I can only imagine how hard this must be for you.
One of my fondest childhood memories is the time our family spent together at the Jersey shore. You may have been too young to remember, I was too young to remember everything. I do however remember we were playing together and I was carrying you around in a pillow case. I remember the feeling I had when I looked into the pillow case, I was watching over you and I needed to keep you safe. I have that feeling now but this time God is watching over you, keeping you safe and will carry you as long as it takes.
Love Greg, Melissa and Taylor
On behalf on the Toleman/Green families, please know that both of you are in our thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteSusan Green (MBC)
Just a practical suggestion - could you get her one of those small, magnetic whiteboards? Or just bring her pencil & paper? Then she would be able to express herself more easily, which might relieve her anxiety.
ReplyDeleteA current Cedarville student...
On behalf of Jocelyn and Alan (Jason Herr's sister)....
ReplyDeleteWe are praying for both of you! Ps. 46:1- God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble".
Lamar~ Keep being strong, the Lord is with you each day! I hope they can extubate Gracie soon. She must be in such discomfort, to say the least. Love you both and I know you can get through this, one day at a time! Take care. Still praying...
ReplyDeleteLamar~ forgot to end with..Love, Michelle and Keith
ReplyDelete